People, I hope your weekend has been chilled. Mine has been, I've had a pretty awesome weekend, both by myself and in the company of others. Seriously, I love how I can enjoy my own company so much. Yet, sometimes it bothers me, I wish I enjoyed it just a little less so I can spend more time with other humans. It was therefore for that reason that when Chocolate called me on Friday to say we were all to hang out on some private beach on Saturday and everyone was to bring something along, I didn't hesitate for a second. I instantly RSVP'd YES.
So Saturday afternoon we set off for this piece of paradise. A friend and her fiancé wanted to host other couples and a few friends. We were few, less than twelve actually and it was just perfect; intimate and laid back. Everyone did bring something along. Ona made the maddest pasta fettuccini with seafood, Chocolate ordered what's easily the best small chops I've ever eaten, no lie! I grabbed some pastry from a restaurant and everyone else brought something too. At that moment when the scrumptious sumptuous food laden table stood before us, threatening to cave in under the weight of the rather excessive feast, #fitfam was damned!
It therefore happened that after eating wayyy to much, I wanted a puff from my e-cig (my mum now reads this blog so please let me point out that an electronic cigarette is basically like vapour and vapour that I indulge in only socially, and seeing as I'm not social often, that means seldom! *pheew*!), to kinda "step" the food down, whatever that means.
At some point I whispered this to Chocolate's husband who was sitting beside me, Ona overheard and suggested I just go ahead right there, but I said "With all these married people here? Abeg oooo. I can't!".
So, for privacy sake the three of us strolled to a private area away from the group where we could just gist and I could bring out my 'device' and do what I wanted to. It felt good to be away from "prying eyes" of the okos and iyawos that I wasn't familiar with. By prying eyes, I actually meant the couple sitting opposite me.
The guy was an okay looking Lagos boy but his wife seemed like Miss Judgy Goody2shoes. She had natural hair, no makeup, heavily medicated eyeglasses, lose clothes and a super serious demeanor. I think it was them I didn't want to be around.
You can then imagine my displeasure when I saw them stroll towards our own mini group, and my shock when the husband asked us if we had a crusher and some rizler. We were quite surprised at their request and we told them we didn't. An unperturbed Miss Judgy Goody2shoes then said to her husband, "Don't worry honey, I have some with me".
Next thing I know this chica opened her bag, brought some things out and began to roll what I learnt was some very high grade super-intoxicating weed.
Before I could blink, she rolled another for her husband and the duo just leaned against the wall and began to puff away.
I tried to hide my shock but I guess it didn't work because Le hubs saw the way I was staring at them and chuckled.
"The couple that smokes together.... Stays together" he said cheerfully, casually.
I smiled and looked away. I was.... Shy. LOL.
I don't like/do weed or drugs so I soon excused myself and went back to the table and my friends soon joined me, leaving the duo to do their thing. But, I've not been able to stop thinking about it.
You know, there's something about that couple I think I really like. I might be wrong but I think couples who are really able to kick back and enjoy/indulge in their vices together, are more likely to stay together. Not only stay together, but very happily so.
Vices aren't great, neither is indulging in them. But I know couples where Mr A does xyz and his wife has absolutely no knowledge about it, and vice versa. Mr A and his wife might actually have an okay or good marriage, but I find that secrecy very unsettling. It's kinda like living a double life, having/doing something in your life that your life partner has absolutely no knowledge about. I do not like that.
I guess that's why there's something about yesterday's couple, married for three years with a kid, that I admired. That act that might be frowned upon by many, to me, spoke not only of love but of friendship.
Friendship, probably the most important recipe for a good marriage...
Yet, your opinion might differ. What do you think about married couples that are open about their vices with each other and actually indulge together, or at least, accept it. Do you think it's a recipe for disaster; something that could come to bite them in the butt in future? Or do you think it strengthens the bond between husband & wife?
Are there things you do that you would NEVER want or allow your partner to know about? Please share.
(Ps. see how funny life is? Sometimes I'm very real, caring little about judgment because I say to people, the person you're hiding from or pretending 'for', you don't know what they do behind closed doors. See me hiding my small electronic cigarette that blows watery vapour into the air from some people that do tinz dat I haff never do... Funny isn't it?... LOLZ.)
photo source; www.alexandaherrera.com