A man who cheats is many women's biggest problem or fear. An abusive man is an absolute nightmare that no one should have to live with. A stingy man is said to be even worse than an unfaithful man. Most women run away from these, your truly included. But these other three also make me want to put my shoes on and take a walk. They are.
The Unapologetic. He just cannot say he is sorry. It's either he feels he is never wrong, or when he accepts he is wrong, he feels his wrongdoing is justified, or when he knows he is wrong and unjustified, he is simply too proud to express remorse. My problem with this kind of partner is that time and time again you're going to keep forgiving someone who hasn't even asked you for forgiveness. This happening over time can lead to resentment, it could lead to bitterness from so many unresolved issues. Worse yet, it could lead to unrest and ugly fights in the home, because time might come when you no longer want to forgive without being asked, you no longer want to feel like you're being walked over, you want him to take actually responsibility for his slip ups! And so no, I wouldnt want to spend the rest of my life with this type of man. As humans beings, no matter how much we love each other, arguments and misunderstandings are bound to happen. Forever is way to long to spend with someone who can't say "I'm sorry" when they hurt me. (Mind you, this also applies to females too ).
The Unforgiving. This brother is even worse than the unapologetic. The unapologetic is simply unapologetic. In fact, more often than not he knows he is wrong but is just to proud too admit it, and that's not so impossible to live with. The unforgiving on the other hand, the words "I am sorry" mean nothing to him. Even when you go beyond saying the words and go further to SHOW that you are sorry and try to make things right, they just cannot accept your apology. These ones are deep and very dangerous. They are quick to keep malice and can comfortably do so for extended periods of time, even while sleeping on the same bed with you. You can talk and beg until your throat gets sore, they just wouldn't budge. Even in the most minor offenses they take the greatest offense and hold on tightly to their indignation! These one drain you emotionally. Nobody should have to put up with the unforgiving life partner. Life is way to short and wayyy to long to live in such unnecessary agony. (Just like the above, this applies to women too. Although being a Nigerian wife these days means that you have to forgive all sorts whether or whether'nt your forgiveness has been sort, so...)
The "Okay being Okay": This wouldn't be an absolute deal breaker but I pray I don't end up with him. The okay being okay is Unambitious. He has an okay job, he drives an okay car, he lives in an okay apartment and he is okay with that. Contentment is good but this kind of contentment can be near disastrous when he becomes a husband and a father. He sees no reason why you should strive to live in a better apartment, in a better part of town. He says things like "Children who go to inexpensive schools still turn out ok so why should I spend so so and so amount on XYZ school?" when you want to put your kids in a competitive school. He considers things like travel and exposure as frivolous luxuries that one need not bother with.
My problem with such a man is that he rarely ever amounts to much. He doesn't aspire to greatness or wealth and so it just doesn't come to him! Even if such a man makes a fine husband, the children deserve more. Yes, even if I'm successful supermom who can give her kids the world, I want daddy to be superdad too. They deserve a father that WANTS to give them the best of everthing not just the basics. More importantly they deserve a father that inspires them, one that may not be wealthy but visibly aspires to have more. I don't want the "Okay being Okay" because my children deserve better.
We're all different, different perceptions, different tolerance levels. The flaws I feel I can't handle are flaws that you may not even consider flaws, and vice versa. So tell me the flaws you'd walk away from in a heart beat.