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Saturday, 28 January 2017

Maybel: Losing The Vibe.

I met Mr B after a short while I joined my former company,I was the one who attended to him and in the process we got chatting and after few minutes of chatting, he left his complimentary card with a plea that I call him. I closed from work at about 2pm, went to the changing room and sat down. I brought out Mr B's complimentary card and stared at it for a while with a lot of things running through my mind like, who is this cutie? The sudden feeling of butterflies and happiness, the thought of him just made me feel this inner peace. I changed and signed out of the office. I brought out the card and dialed Mr B's number, he was excited to hear from me and that was the beginning of a friendship that later led to a relationship. 

After two months of being intimate, we were having a phone conversation and he made it clear to me that we weren't heading anywhere and that he cant marry someone from the east. he gave his reasons and all but that for me was the beginning of a subconscious feeling of "you are not meant to be in this relationship and it would end soon, so be prepared". 

Fast forward to January 2017, Mr B told me we would not being seeing for the whole of January because of my first semester exams which was to commence from the second weekend in the same month and there is this company report that they ought to have started in mid December 2016 but was delayed for some reasons, I had to concur even though it didn't go down well with me but I couldn't fight it knowing the kind of man I was with. Let me digress a bit,Mr B is blunt,says things the way they are no matter how hurt the other party may seem to be or feel, he is someone who doesn't want disturbance or distraction whenever he is battling with or trying to focus on stuffs. Now back to the main ish of us not seeing in January, I suddenly noticed he rarely calls and whenever he or I did,he would be eager to get off the phone. Our long night conversations suddenly started to diminish and when I asked, he says he has a lot going on for him and he needs to focus. Just yesterday,I noticed all my whatsapp messages were not being responded to and I had to send him another one asking if it was just this report or there is more to it.

Mr B called the next morning being a Saturday and after exchanging pleasantries, he dropped the bombshell. "i saw your message, haven't you noticed the vibe between us is no longer there, or am I just the one?"

I answered; "my own vibe is fine really, except its you" 

Then he went ahead to explain why he can't live in denial and the fact that he has lost the vibe he used to feel and all. I was speechless needless to say, even though I knew my being with him was not heading anywhere, I just wasn't expecting it to end so soon. That was how it ended with Mr B in just four months.

And Ohhh lest I forget, there is someone else because he says he can't be friends with me anymore so he doesn't jeopardize the new flame that has been sparked by her.
Note: we never had issues or neither did I offend him. 

Now my question is this, guys,
is this how you loose your vibes? What can make you loose that spark you had in less than a few months? And finally Mr B told me when we first met that he has never been in a long relationship because the vibes don't last for him. Maybe that should have been the red flag but I choose to be blinded. 

Mr B opens this blog once a while because I introduced it to him, so in case you see this Mr B, I am doing just fine, thanks for making me stronger.

Awww Maybel you'll be fine. Men be ghosting on girls for no reason since 1860. Please don't beat yourself up asking Why? Because there are no answers. 

Guy meets girl. Guy asks girl out. Girl gives it a shot and they start vibing. Guy likes girl. Girl starts liking guy. Girl really starts liking guy. Guy stops calling as often. Guys stops texting as often as he used to. Guy becomes suddenly busy. Guy becomes too busy for girl. Guy completely ignores your existence and leaves you confused, hurt and miserable. Until the next fuckboy comes along. 

Move on hunny. 

Ladies lets pray. May our intuitions be sharper and our senses stronger so that we may sniff fuckboyism from a mile away and run far far away! Amen. 



  1. Amen @ prayer. Am married though. Lol. Thelma soRy i've been so choked buh wil send a writeup this week. Layefa

  2. LOL,T,your analysis be making me laugh. thanks mam,am doing just fine really. e hugs bae.favourite baby,you are bae too ,meeting you at the hangout sparked a flame of friendship and you have been there all the time,you check on me,we gist and chat like we have known for ever. I hope to see you again.kisses to you.

    1. Ah ah, it was a fling, you knew,you saw him in his full fuckboy Jersey and still chose to play ball? What were you expecting? He told you, I just don't get it .
      A Girl

  3. "you are not meant to be in this relationship and it would end soon, so be prepared" - Mabel 3:16

    Isn't it weird how we see the written words as clear as glass more often than not, yet we don't take heed? Dearest Mabel, I understand how attached you must've been in this relationship, but oga made his intensions known bluntly after 2 months for whatever reasons. From all you've written, it's obvious you didn't obey your own rule of being prepared and you feel rejected right now. Don't blame him, he was truthful and blunt about almost everything and, though kinda selfish to wait a whole 2 months before laying his actual cards on the table, I really hope you come out quickly from this distressed state because its not worth it. Thank goodness you're stronger, but hold no resentment towards him whatsoever. GOD bless dear.

    If we had a lot of guys and girls like Mr. B, we wouldn't be having our relationship world in a horrible state.

    1. LOL,Memphis has created a bible passage for me,okay now. and really,I hold nothing against him,trust me,I wouldn't have even written about it,but I had to cos I just wanted someone out there to not make the mistakes I made and yes,I agree with your last paragraph because Mr B is truthful and blunt Like that,so maybe we need more of him around.

  4. Awww Maybel,you would be fine...Me I think Mr B has a fiancé somewhere or a wife sef and he is just using you to catch cruise...Just forget about him totally..TNHW

  5. To answer your questions:
    1) Yes. Guys lose it easily. Especially after sex. Depending on how good the sex was.
    2) So many things. Most especially the reason for entering the relationship - If a guy gets into a relationship for short term, then dont expect him to be around for the long term (there are exceptions - only bad ass bitches causes these exceptions) He knew your state of origin before things started, so he already knew he wasnt going to stay long.
    3) Yap. That was a sign. He prepared your mind.

    Ill give Mr B 75% for playing his game well. I think he was respectful.


  6. At least he made his intentions you no gree read handwriting wey dey for wall.

    Doh dear.



  7. he's making you feel like it's your fault, but he was never committed to the relationship to start with. Chin up, you did nothing to "lose the vibe". No be swear I dey swear for am o, but check back on that new flame he found in 6 months' time, and see how much of the fire is left burning. A player is a player is a player.

    But we live and learn. There were many red flags in this relationship that you missed along the way. Be more observant and careful next time. By the way, you deserve a man that knows your worth.


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