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Sunday, 26 March 2017

#FranklySpeaking. For Mother's Day; You Girls Rock!

Today, the women ministry of the satellite church where I worship did a choreographed dance for Africa's most popular music, Nico Mbarga's " Sweet Mother".

As I watched the women dance, I began to meditate on the essence of motherhood and my eyes became moist as I reminisced about my mother who passed on in 2004.

It wasn't thoughts of anguish or mourning but a sudden realization of the great importance of motherhood to this world .

One of the most amazing things about motherhood is how they blend love and discipline together, dishing the two out when necessary .

As much as my mother loved me passionately, there has been times when she slapped me and I'd almost convince myself that I was an adopted child.

Her favorite bible portion was "withhold not the rod from his back". Kai. I used to wonder if God was watching while people included that portion into the bible . 'Spare the rod and spoil the child'. Rod. Rod! no be even cane, na wao oo.

I still remember the first day I slept outside the house as a young graduate and my mother welcomed me home with hot slaps. I still couldn't believe it. For Gods sake I'm a graduate! "Graduate nonsense" My mother screamed and more slaps chased me. Kai. Which kind life be this?

As at my JSS 1, I had graduated from reading Pacesetters novels to James Hadley Chase. I still remember how I used to hide James Hadley Chase novels inside my text books and read . Mum was so happy that this little rascal has started loving his books for once . I could feel her joy whenever she sees me 'reading'. Until one day I slept off with the book and mum came to help me keep my book away .

Two slaps woke me up. From my misty gaze I could see my James Hadley Chase novel in mums hands, she was livid with anger. The funny thing is that the novels often had half naked girls in front of it, so mum felt I was now into pornography.

Then I committed further sacrilege. I tried to explain that it wasn't a pornographic book. "then what sort of book is this?" another question with a slap.

"it's crime fiction ", I blurted out. "Ewoooooooo. Crime gini? So you are reading books on how to be a criminal ?"

Realizing what I had to done to myself, I headed for the door straight as thousands of slaps chased me.

Parenting five children all alone wasn't an easy task so today I cherish the discipline of mum as it whipped I and my siblings into line and never allowed anyone of us to fall by the way side.

Irrespective of the iron clad discipline, the love and compassion that flowed from her bosom was even more amazing. It was like two extremes of equal severity . 

As a University student my mother would cook from Portharcout and bring for me in school. She made sure I knew no lack. And whenever I ran into trouble, my confidence is always that mum will show up and I'd be home free. 

She denied herself so much for us to have good education, making sure no vacuums of lack were created. Even though mum wasn't so rich, she made us look like children of the rich. 

When she left us in 2004, I sincerely and honestly thought I was going to die. It was the peak of pain. Her exit was shocking and sudden, especially when it happened at a time I referred to as the early afternoon of her life. She was just 47. 

As the women continued to dance to the admiration of the congregation, I found myself clutching tightly at my wife's  palm. My wife has part filled that vacuum of love and discipline. A missed call from my wife on friday night is enough to let me know I have to get home in the next few minutes .

Freedom without control can become captivity, so I willingly subdue myself to some level of control from my 'commander in chief ' which is almost similar to parental control. 

Yes, you can be so free that the freedom becomes a bondage.

I think mothers are the greatest things that God created. A few months back, there was a serious electric spark in the compound where I live and everybody thought there will be a fire outbreak. I still wonder how my wife picked up three of her children, in pitch darkness and ran downstairs while I was still putting on my trousers.

These specie of people are incredible. They should be respected and honored.

Imagine my deep chagrin when I hear of people who turn their wives to punching bags at home . 

With all due honestly, those who beat their wives are extremely foolish. No, seriously if you beat the mother of your children, stand in front of the mirror and tell yourself 'I am very foolish '.

More foolish is the excuse most people give by claiming their wives provoked them. Now, that's the biggest lie from the pit of hades. 

Even Satan cringes at this great lie. The truth is that the only reason most men keep hitting their wives is because there are no immediate consequences.

If your wife had a cocked pistol in her hand, no matter how much she provokes you, your head will be correct. If your wife is a black belt Taekwando, much stronger than you, no matter how much she provokes you, you will never hit her.

The only reason you hit her is because she is physically weaker and this, ironically should have been why you should protect her.

How many times have you beaten up a Mopol man for provoking you on the road? The armed robbers who attacked you and gave you hot slaps, how many did you beat up? Why do people obey the check points more when they see soldiers? No matter how much in a hurry you are, as the man dey carry hand up, all the cars don hold break. 

That's the power of consequences .

So it's not about provocation my dear. Anytime you want your head to be correct, it will be correct .

In the Christian bible, the book of Malachi shows how much God values treating your woman with respect. In Malachi 2:13-16, God clearly said your offerings are pollutions to his alter if you don't treat your woman right.

So if you are treating her bad and giving offering in church, you might as well keep your money and stop annoying God with polluted offering .

Greatest respect to all mothers and potential mothers.

You girls rock !!!

Photo source: Pinterest. 


  1. 'As much as my mum loved me passionately,there were times she slapped me and I almost convinced myself I am an adopted child',lols,this resonates so deeply with me.As loving as my mum is and has always been in the past about me and my siblings,some of her 'ifooti' in the past had me wondering if she was really my mother.

    Mothers rock,happy mothers day to all mothers and potential mothers.

    Such a wonderful writeup FranklySpeaking,thank you

  2. Very wonderful writeup FranklySpeaking! Really loved reading every bit of it....And just like you, I am often in awe of mothers, wives, women and the feminine gender. Happy Mother's day Mum, and also, to all mothers, and mothers-to-be!

  3. Everything frankly speaking writes is a hit back to back. I enjoyed this. More please!

  4. If your wife had a cocked pistol in her hand, no matter how much she provokes you, your head will be correct. If your wife is a black belt Taekwando, much stronger than you, no matter how much she provokes you, you will never hit her. #Word.

  5. Awww...Are you sure your mama and my mom ain't related?My mama would beat me then and I tell people that her elder sister who was in jand was my mom that I was only living with her...#iloveyoumama Happy Mothering Sunday to all the women...TNHW

  6. Awwn... This made me so emotional. Mothers rock everywhere.

  7. Dude. Good write up.


  8. Omg, I'm totally blown away by this post . 😥Thelma please do well to include FS contacts on his posts, some people might want to consult him or her on other things . Don't also forget that some of us are sapiosexual if it's a he which I suspect 🙈. Maybel

  9. my mum that disciplined me into introversion, using 'first son getting into my head' as a leeway to factory reset me whenever I misplaced a step. But what she has sacrificed for me, I can never repay both in kind or monetarily.That woman is not mortal.

  10. There are so many similarities between this write up and what pastor lane of house on the rock ph said on sunday. Good stuff dude.

  11. Beautiful write up . Big ups to Mothers .

  12. The writer shares a lot in common with me . Beautiful soul . You made me laugh and cry all in one post . Anuli .


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