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Showing posts from April, 2017

#MomentofTruth. I'm Just a Hater!

Truth time!!!
It takes great maturity to admit that you've got a shameful flaw. Something like, finding out you're a Hater.
I've just admitted that, so on the bright side, you can call me mature 😉☺️. 
I'm seeing several definitions of the word/slang; Hater, online and I normally wouldn't refer to myself that way but how else could you explain scrolling through Instagram, seeing someone's picture and it's so fire🔥🔥🔥! Then you ask yourself what is this one even feeling like sef, and you immediate go and unfollow them? 🙈
I hit that unfollow button so hard you'd think I was going to break my phone's screen! 
Then as I continued to scroll down while internally rolling my eyes, I asked myself but Nwando, why? Are you a hater? 
Well it looks like I am. 
Or maybe it's that I'd just walked pass a mirror and caught a glimpse of my drawn bare face which I had meticulously made up an hour ago, makeup that been wiped away by stress, stress caused dema…

PHOTOS: Linus Idahosa & Several Nigerian Governors At The Nigeria-China Governors’ Investment Forum In China

Nigerian State Governors, the Vice Mayor of Guangzhou and Presidents of some of the largest Fortune 500 Companies in China recently gathered for deliberations at the first Nigeria-China Governors’ Investment Forum which took place in the metropolitan city of Guangzhou in China.Among the 15 governors who were present at the Forum were Gov Samuel Ortom, Benue State; Gov Ifeanyi Okowa, Delta State; Gov. Abiola Ajimobi, Oyo State, Gov. Abdullahi Umar Ganduje; Kano State; Gov. Abubakar Sani Bello, Niger State; Gov Okezie Ikpeazu, Abia State; Gov Aminu Tambuwal, Sokoto State; Gov. Kashim Shettima, Borno State, Governor Rauf Aregbesola, Osun State; Dep. Gov. Anambra State, Nkem Okeke, Dep. Gov. Ebonyi State, Others are the The Chairman of the Nigerian Governors’ Forum and Governor of Zamfara State, Gov. Abdul’aziz Abubakar Yari, Plateau, Kwara and more. The Vice Mayor of Guangzhou, Cai Chaolin; President of GAC Group, Zeng Qinghong; President of Choice International Group, Diana Chan; the Ex…

Dear Thelma (Is This a Red Flag?)

I recently started dating Ayo (not real name). It's still very fresh, less than one month. We're in that honeymoon phase, we like each other a whole lot, I've been very excited because he is the most handsome man I know and now he's even my boyfriend. He's a nice and very hardworking man. But when we were talking last night he said something I found very weird. I was visiting my parents for the weekend and I told him that I was in my mum's room and I would sleep there for the night. He asked why I wanted to and I said nothing, that I just like it. He then said he too he likes sleeping with his mum when he goes to visit her, that in fact when he travels to visit her it's in her room that he always sleeps. I found it strange that a 34 year old man would still sleep in the same bed with his mother but that wasn't even the strange part. He said that he likes sleeping with his mum because he likes playing with that black thing. That he plays with it until he…

The Best Thing About Dating Me!

Hiii guys (in my mind I always say this in Toke Makinwa's vlogger voice), how's your Sunday going? Mine is going alright, I'm learning how to smile more. I was told three days ago that my stern face and Queen's English is going to tighten men's wallets and I'm going to need to be more engaging, stroke their egos and smile more if I want them to spend more. 
Hmm, Help me baby Jezess. 😰😂
So it just occured to me that I read many posts with people talking about the worst thing about dating them, and while it's fun reading the comments, people rarely ever talk about the best thing about dating them. 
This is actually a pretty shaky question to ask because most people would either lie, or be under a misconception about their own character and personality. 
So I'm going to answer this question based on things people I've dated have told me, and I hope you do so too. 
They say I'm a "good person", loyal, kind, passionate, a passionate lover *thi…

Saying "I Do" & Things...

It's been a very frenetic past few days and I wish I'd been able to take more pictures because these few do not even remotely capture the essence of the conference and how much work and effort was put into it. But, thankfully I managed to take a few. 

The above were taken on Friday, of me and my awesome team of decorators (@folashecrowneventsandmore) during set up. We worked late into the night as we wanted to be done before Saturday, seeing as the conference was to start at 8.45am. 
We kept the decor simple and light as opposed to lavish, because conferences tend to require a much more subtle and quiet theme. 
On Saturday we had loads of vendors (only able to take a few pics 😔) 
Someone gifted us with this cake. In fact the gifts we got were many. Someone also gave us 100 yummy red velvet and chocolate cupcakes. We got free books, free media coverage, cash gifts, food, small chops etc. May God bless and replenish all the givers. 

My registration team. MJ, Rozay and Blessing. OMG!…

#ThrowbackThursday. My Absolute Worst!

Hey guys, in the spirit of #ThrowbackThursday lets reflect on our secondary school days. I was just going through my cousin's report sheet and he's got As in maths, biology and physics. And it makes absolutely no sense to me that someone so smart could get an F in English. Like, it simply defies logic!
But looking back at high school, there were those super smart further math geeks who chewed on maths and sciences like it was suya but the just couldn't understand English. I'm still yet to understand this. 
For me, that one subject that I hated, HATED, and never seemed to do well at no matter how hard I tried or how much effort I put into it, it was maths. 
Subjects like English, government, commerce and literature were a breeze for me. But maths, maths... 
Math was my worst subject in secondary school
What was yours?


Big Brother House Is Not An Achievement!

They kept majority of Nigerians entertained for several days and now it's over. I sincerely like that it's a potential platform for starting or solidifying the housemate's careers, everyone needs and deserves that.
But I would be lying if I say I'm not confused about certain things. Like, why were the house mates awarded plots of land in Abuja? Why are they being thrown homecoming ceremonies and given stately welcome? Why are they being honoured?
If you're a fan you may call me jealous, and that's alright. I on the other hand would refer to myself as confused.
To the best of my knowledge, some capitalists called for an audition, picked some people at random, threw them into a house filled with cameras, gave them some controversial tasks to get people talking and days later after days of eating, dancing, quareling, drinking and getting drunk, making out, talking, sleeping etc etc etc these people came out. 
And now they get to be honoured.
Why exactly? 
I saw the imag…

Now, On To That Bleaching Business...

So my people, thanks to the stress that I've been experiencing in the past weeks, my skin hasn't been all that great. In fact, the two people in my life who are totally anti skin-lightening started to complain that I was getting darker; my mum and my man. In fact the man sent me money and asked me to go and do whatever it was I was doing before that gave me great skin. 
But you see, I wasn't doing anything! So I was confused. I was also bummed by the "getting darker" talk because, mehn, I'm already dark enough biko. 
It just so happened that while driving around Surulere a few weeks back I noticed that there's a Bismid complex. Exciting stuff, seeing as I'd been looking for one Bismid bath wash I used a year ago and I've only seen fakes so far. The soap didn't lighten me or anything but I just liked it.
And so, armed with my ATM card early Saturday morning, I drove down to the Bismid complex and it's the most fascinating experience I've h…

3 Types of Blog Readers & 1 Thing I Hate About Being a Blogger.

And if you read that title and turned up your nose in a yinmu position saying "this one too thinks she's a blogger" I wouldn't blame you o jare. Me sef, I used the word loosely. 
In any case I'm still posting on this blog so I'll call myself that. 
Yesterday, our darling blog reader, Tiwa celebrated her son's birthday. Hello, Leon just turned 1🎂.  Time flies mehnnnn. I still remember that night she gave birth to him when she sent me a video from the labour room. One insanely cute video that made my womb squeal!
So we went to turn up with Leon yesterday and two of my favs from the blog showed up too, Kon and Sunshine. 
This post was inspired by Kon. 
So you see, I've been thinking about it since yesterday. Why was Kon so quiet? I know he's a bit shyer than you'd expect but I notice that after the ice has broken, he would really calm down and open up. At least that's what I noticed when he came for my nephew's 1st birthday in January. He was…

Happy Easter!

Happy Easter guys.  May You find fulfilment Everyday Of Your Life.
As The Angels Rolled The Stone Away, May Every Obstacle Be Rolled Away from You. As The Guards Felt The Quake And Were Filled With Fear... May Your Enemies Hear Your Name and Be Gripped With Fear.


Saying I Do Conference 2017. Register Now!!!

Ladies and gentlemen, I would not forgive myself if I don't share this with you. Not only because I'm the event planner for this conference, but because I strongly believe that you will benefit greatly from it. 
Guys, this conference doesn't only have top-notch, world class speakers like Charles Otudor, Praise Fowowe, Yinka Ogunnubi and many amazing others, this conference is absolutely FREE!

We're excited to announce that this year, @jackietalkz in collaboration with @happyeverafterhub will be holding the 1st Edition of the Saying I DO Conference a follow on from the Before You Say I Do Conference. 

Last year, we held the #BeforeYouSayIDo conference and it was a huge success. The feedback has been overwhelming and humbling. It was an eventful day of fun , learning, networking and lucky individuals went home with choice prizes. 

This year, we've gone back to the drawing board and decided to come back bigger and better. Are you excited yet?

We …

The Headmasters & Munchers... 5 Kinds of Guys & How They Go Down.

I have never met a man who would admit to being a bad head-giver. They would swear up and down that women who came across them will be left with shaking limbs and incoherent thoughts. Considering the fact a very high percentage of women I have talked to, have said they have never received a mind-blowing head, something is definitely off somewhere. I have spoken to a number of women on the kinds of heady attention they have experienced and why they will (or will not) accept future offers. The experiences can be best categorised into five main kinds of guys. The Munchers
Picture digging into a juicy piece of Shaki. The vigorous biting and sucking and gnawing all so that you can enjoy not only chewing into the goodness but also making sure you syphon all the juice from it. Now, imagine you are that piece of Shaki being attacked by a ravenous lion. Does that make you shudder a little?
These kinds of guys take ‘eating’ literally. They would leave you burning up and not in a good way. The Thrust…

Rueben Abati, This Is Absolutely Wrong!

This article by Rueben Abati brought me out of my blogging-slumber. It's the meanest, most insulting, most demeaning tripe I've read in recent times. Up until now, I've considered this man one of the most brilliant writers of his time. I devour his articles hungrily because I almost always learn from his wealth of knowledge. But on this article below, I say Shame on you sir. You have absolutely not right to write the things written below.  None whatsoever. 

Lesson three: humility pays. At the end of the day, in the last week of the programme, the decision by the viewing public was a moral, sentimental one. The biggest star of the programme was, I don’t know what you think, TBOSS (real name: Tokunbo Idowu), half Nigerian, half-Romanian. She dominated the space with her Jezebelic antics, even got some of the male participants ousted by entrapping and outsmarting them with her sexual wiles. She projected herself as a sex object, the ultimate manipulator, the champion Delilah o…

The Omo-Onile Issue... Twisting My Arm.

If you've lived in Lagos then you've probably heard of Omo-onile. The children of the land or whatever...
As you can see from the comments I found online (Nairaland), dragging issues with these people would be a waste of time, potentially dangerous and an exercise in futility. 
I just rounded up a meeting with a number of them, where I had to part with about 100k cash, the second time I would be putting my hard earned cash in their hands just this year alone. 
Someone might say, but Thelma, aren't you a lawyer, doesn't the property belong to you people? Don't you have the title documents? 
Yes, yes and yes. 
Which makes it even more painful. 
It's disconcerting; the thought that before you can make improvements on your own property, they descend on you like vultures if you haven't settled them beforehand. For instance, sometime last year when I all needed done was some wood work outside the building, they came and scattered the job, broke the work that had alread…

Sam's Dilemma; Miss 'Ride or Die' vs Miss 'I'll Only Ride In a Benz'?

This post is on special request. 
A male friend of mine who's eager to settle down (no, not only women are "desperate" to marry) is a bit confused. So he's praying to wed by December of this year and is actively pursuing this goal. He has cut his search down to two young ladies. There were other ladies in the running, some whom he even liked,probably loved more than this two, but they didn't meet the wifey criteria... Like this one he was in love with who claimed that as a feminist, when she's a wife she would continue to go for late night drinks and meetings with clients and prospective clients because if a husband can, so can a wife... This argument arose after she left home at 11pm one night because that was the only time a client was available to meet. She came back after 1am and insisted that it was a part of her job and she had done nothing wrong. Well after that *Sam began to have his doubts. 
Back to the matter. Sam is seeing two young ladies and he swe…

She's a Beast In Bed. (Tigernut Juice Thingz)

She swears it's the reason he's hooked on her. 
She swears it's the reason he has eyes for only her. 
This makes her giggle like she's drunk, because she says he used to be a dog but her juice has turned him into a loyal doe-eyed lamb. 
She swears it's partly the reason he proposed. She says otherwise he for dey take her dey play, but now he cannot afford to lose her. The thought of another man eating from her pot is too much for him to bear. 
She says she used to be pretty ordinary in the sack, just average. She was rarely ever in the mood for sex and it always took a lot of work to get her body in the mood, you know, that mood. Mood enough to get the juices flowing. But now (in her words) she just dey drip like tap *covers face*. 
She swears she owes it all to Kayanmata. 
Actually it's not really Kayanmata as some people call it, it's simply tigernut juice. 
I'm sure many of you have heard about it and me, I'm curious af!
I've read so many testimonies…

So Glad It's "Marched" Away... Hello April!

Damn! Guys, please tell me that a new month is really a new start. Kai, I had the weirdest month ever. Jesus.
March, my birth month. 
Where do I ever begin? That month was the weirdest month ever. I cried enough tears to last the whole of 2017. 
It had its good parts, but mostly, it was just a very confusing, weird, torturous month for me. 
Last night I was chatting with one of my favourite bloggers who blogs anonymously and weighing the pros and cons of blogging anonymously vs with your identity. I told her one of the reasons I regret having my identity in the open is that it doesn't afford me the freedom to blog about what I want anymore. 
For instance, if none of you could put a face to the name I would gladly tell you in details how March was for me. But for now, let's just say it's a month I want to never come back. 
I think if I were to let you in I'd say, among other things, I kinda, sorta got proposed to in March... And then the proposal kinda, sorta, was retrac…