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Tuesday, 18 April 2017

Now, On To That Bleaching Business...

So my people, thanks to the stress that I've been experiencing in the past weeks, my skin hasn't been all that great. In fact, the two people in my life who are totally anti skin-lightening started to complain that I was getting darker; my mum and my man. In fact the man sent me money and asked me to go and do whatever it was I was doing before that gave me great skin. 

But you see, I wasn't doing anything! So I was confused. I was also bummed by the "getting darker" talk because, mehn, I'm already dark enough biko. 

It just so happened that while driving around Surulere a few weeks back I noticed that there's a Bismid complex. Exciting stuff, seeing as I'd been looking for one Bismid bath wash I used a year ago and I've only seen fakes so far. The soap didn't lighten me or anything but I just liked it.

And so, armed with my ATM card early Saturday morning, I drove down to the Bismid complex and it's the most fascinating experience I've had in a while. 

The door swung open just as I was about to step in. A neatly dressed guard nodded curtly while a corporate looking man in chinos welcomed me in with an outstretched hand. The place was buzzing with so much activity but still I could tell it was beautifully furnished. The staff wore neatly pressed uniforms and flawless makeup. 

The man ushered me to a sales girl.

"Err, I want to buy one soap I used one time, it was good, it's in a brown bottle, I think. But I still want to know what to use to make my skin look better" I said unsurely 

"Ok, if you want to know then you should talk to our owner for consultation". 

She pointed me towards a door. "Tell the security guard that you want to talk to Bismid" she said. 

I walked towards the door, girls everywhere. Different shades and ages. Different walks of life; the posh, the wannabes and the unrefined alike. I got there to find that there was a scramble to talk to "Bismid". There was a queue. The girls were mainly light skinned or very yellow, only a small handful were dark. Most of them had nails as long as talons and lashes that looked like brooms. Each one eyed the other as though to see who had the best skin of all. 

Each time the door opened there was a fight about whose turn it was to see Bismid next. And people went in in 3s, because we were quite a lot!

I noticed some staff walk around with ice cold bottles of baileys and champagne with wine glasses, perhaps for people at the VIP section, yes there's one. Eventually it was my turn to go in and see Bismid. 

Guys, it was like going in for consultation with a neurosurgeon, and these girls took it just as seriously! 

As I sat across the chubby yellowish lady with a gold tooth in her mouth, I wasn't quite sure what to say. I mean, I'd just sat through the other two ladies' consultations. One was with her mother. Both she and Mum wanted to bleach and they wanted something for their black knuckles and black toes, caused by bleaching. LOL. Bismid furiously scribbled a prescription for them in her notepad, as studiously as a medical doctor would. The other lady had a sun-burnt face and discoloration. She said she didn't want to be lighter but wanted clear even-toned skin. Once again, Bismid scribbled furiously and sent her upstairs with her diagnosis and prescription, ordering her to first do a facial. 

It came to my turn and I suddenly started to giggle. I mean, I just walked in there to buy bath wash! 

"em, so.... I, i,... So I... I used to use one Bismid soap. I I..." 

"What do you want? To bleach or to tone?" She asked casually, cutting in. 

"What's the difference?" I asked her 

"Bleaching means you want to really lighten, whiten your skin. It means you want to completely transform it. Toning means you just want a skin glow, your skin would only get a shade lighter" she said. 

"Toning please". I said. 

She suddenly started to scribble and scribble. One would have thought I'd just hold her I want a Toke Makinwa finish. 

Eventually she handed me the piece of paper and wished me good luck. I was nervous af, because that lengthy scribble looked pretty expensive!

Anyways I went upstairs, was ushered to a seat across another consultant who explained each product to me, what it was meant for, how it was supposed to be used and what I was to expect. 

My head began to ache. I asked her to bring each one, I was suddenly exhausted. 

Well below is a copy of my prescription... Sorry, invoice. 

The chat above shows that I've been using it just as the "doctor" instructed, but if my antecedents are anything to go by, this will be all over in a few days. If you've been reading this blog you'd know that this is like my 5th attempt at this sort of thing. Tbh I'm getting tired already, I really don't think I can keep up, but I really want my skin back to its supple, glowy self! *sigh* 😒 (honestly I think I just need more rest and more water...)

Oh well, if you're interested, the Bismid complex is at Randle street in Surulere, it's off either Itire road or Akerele street, depending on which route you take.

Has any one here used their products? Are they any good? What other products would you recommend? 

And btw, in case you were wondering, bleaching business is BIG business that Bismid lady is cashing out by the millions on a daily! (However I must give her props for how structured and organized her business is, she obviously knows her onions). 



  1. Lol. Team laiskin stays winning...

  2. Looool... I find this really hilarious πŸ˜„πŸ˜„

  3. Today I'm glowing, tomorrow my skin is getting darker. I'm not a skincare freak jare,nowadays my response is always 'it's the weather' no matter the kind of compliment I receive.
    Btw I'm curious about one thing, did these 3 zero figures appear automatically with the invoice?

    1. Lol no, the 000s are part of the cost. I just blurred out the exact figures.

    2. soft work there with the editing. looked professional.

  4. Bismid is very good I use their soap (12,500)...whew..d good Lord is my muscle.. Ms ess..

  5. I'm totally against bleaching for health reasons.. ladies seem to do it cos they feel men are more attracted to light skinned babes ..i also heard it's an expensive habit cos once you stop your skin burns so you have to keep up.

  6. All I wanted to see is the actual cost...

    Sometimes I ask myself..If I was a girl will I bother with these things. Hair, skin, make up etc. Will I bother? They just complicate life.


  7. 45 minutes inside baffroom, because skin CHANGE. Thelma da Thelma. Lol.

    By the way Dettol has unveiled another soap brand; skin toner or something. I don't know if it's as effective as your 5-figure prescription but let's just say this is the first time I'll spend over two weeks in the bush and I don't look burnt

  8. Wawu!... I'm sorry I couldn't be more articulate, but that's all that comes to

  9. I read the chat twice! My woman, my everything...😍😍😍 I dont know why Thelma's love life is doing me gish gish like this o...

    Anywaiz, to the bleaching thing.. I've never cared much for my skin color or looks. I use normal Dettol soap and shea butter or coconut oil as body cream (so my body cream doubles as my hair cream). From time to time is have orishirishi spots on my forehead from peeling pimples and stuff but no time to be spending 45 minutes on body care before sleep.

    I remember once back in school when my uncle used to give us scrubs and hand creams, I was never consistent with the scrub, even the ones I bought with my money... lol I just don't have the patience for all the wahala.. I wish you godspeed with the products😊

    1. Nah real Godspeed πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

      The chat tho 😍😍😍 Thelma Thelma 😍😍😍 my woman! That's some deep sturv you know πŸ˜‰πŸ˜

  10. Nigerians bleaching their way to cancer, soon the hospitals will be cashing out by the millions daily!

    Anything you cannot eat shouldn't go on the skin, the skin is an organ that absorbs stuffs faster than you know it.

    The white folks do tanning to darken up a bit while the black folks wants to go white, bleaching or toning! Amazing world of never happy folks.

    I am starting to rant, is it my bleaching sef!

  11. My husband worries more about my skin than I do. He is the one who worries when pimple or stretch mark shows up.

    the guy just no dey free. After child birth my impeccable skin got better stretch marks .
    He come to inspect it regularly to check progress . my love for shorts ended though.

    It takes time , consistency and patience to see results. at least my daily routine of shea butter and coconut oil is paying off albeit very very slowly.

    our weather is very harsh on the skin , women particularly have to spend more time caring for their skin cos we tend to age faster and child bearing does a lot of "displacement" of essential body parts.

    there are natural and edible products you can equally use to tone up, not chemicals.

  12. You should still have more rest and drink more water. Also don't forget Turmeric mask. I avoid chemicals a lot...that's bad chemicals.

  13. Dear Thelma, I will advice you to not use this product. I have 2 friends who did and it did not turn out well. Right now 1 is seeing a dermatologist to bring her face back to normal. Bismid simply told her when she reported her reactions to her that it was stress. Just thought I should let you know


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