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7 Times I'm Speechless.

1. When my friends are all talking about what their kids said or what their kids did and I want to join in but it's then I realize that "my nephews" and "my sons" are two different things entirely. . 

2. When someone asks me to do a job and promises me I'd get paid; in exposure. 

3. When a brother gives what he thought was a grand performance and then he asks "Did you come" but I didn't even know when it started or that it had ended. *of blessed memory*

4. When these people are trying to make someone regret #nottooyoungtorun. Yul Edochie and K-Cee with their 2019 Anambra Governorship intentions got me all confused then Terry G came and announced that he's running for both Governor and Deputy Governor. I'm like kukuma just kill us. ๐Ÿšถ๐Ÿšถ

5. When I was rubbing powder on my 1 year old nephew's belly and he giggled and squealed and said "I like it. I really really like it". Or last night when he took my face between his tiny chubby palms and said "awwwwn you're too cute". And everytime he opens his mouth to talk and I wonder how a 1 year old not only knows the words but knows exactly what he means. 

6. When I realize we're practically 4 months away from 2018. 

7. When I see Tonto Dike speaking in tongues on Instagram. And when I watch Speed "Bang da da dang" Darlinton videos. And when Bob Risky is talking. Speech-less. 

Add yours. ๐Ÿ˜š


  1. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    1. Awww, Thelma, dis post is everything! Lol. Meanwhile how can a 1year old say those words?#guinessbookofrecordthings
      Secondly, I saw 'of blessed memory', and dat was all I saw!

  2. Hahhahhahahh, Thelma will not kill me, number 3 is epic Biko.... Okay let me add mine..
    Seven times I'm speechless,
    1.When I'm in a gathering and everyone is talking about their various experiences of trips they made outside the country, and I'm like Mabel, you have never gone to Ghana so respect yourselve.
    2. When my friends are talking about uni people (especially private ones)and their plenty difference, I just keep quiet because poly and uni no join rara and the experience aren't similar..
    3. When someone who straffed over night wakes up and still prays, I'm like WTF, how do you do that? Guilty conscience won't even permit me to.
    4. When our ten your last born was able to detect I had fake lashes oneven when my mom didn't notice , shooo, that little kid is so smart Biko..
    5.When you biting me in the process of cuninlingus and you ask me if I'm enjoying it, boda do and get your head up Biko, I'm bruised..
    6. When my sixteen year old sister can draw and conceal her brows perfectly and I'm here jonzing(who the thing epp sef??).
    7... When you tell me I'm the most beautiful girl you have ever seen, WTF?? With my big nose and wide lips? Brother bet why? All lairs will go to hell ohhhh.
    Let me add fisi, 8...when my fellow lady is shy in front of me, I'm not understanding, madam you know yourself... Lol

    1. Babe,you are beautiful jor..Don't let anybody dull your shine ๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜.TNHW

    2. Pouring *holy water* all over this place

    3. Your flawless beauty had me mesmerised. ...hehehe

      on a serious note though, beyond my been shy....I was actually actively listening to you


  3. 1. Last Sunday, while waiting to see the doctor, a little girl(very fair in complexion) and her dad walked in and my seven year old son goes "awwwwnnn, she's so cute". I stare at him. Heads turn towards us. I keep my gaze on my phone. After hearing "she's cute " like another 5 times, I just said I hope you have her bride price ready.

    2. Today, my daughter walks up to me and says "Mummy, I want you to buy a horse for me, a real horse. And for Joshua too." I kept quiet. 5 seconds later, "Mummy, are you going to buy it?" She repeated it like 7times... I didn't answer oo, what was I going to say? I was just laughing inside.

  4. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ @4, your nephew is too cute๐Ÿ˜๐Ÿ˜

    In other news, I was stalking your instagram last week and saw pictures of your brothers, lawdamercy! I was speechless ๐Ÿ˜ถ

  5. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ your children are cute

  6. #3: Is Embarrassment Quotient being sold at any market in Lagos? I need some on behalf our brother.

    - When people keep telling me I look Yoruba. This started way back in 1999 and has continued till now. Is there a particular way Yoruba people look? Lol.

    - When I tell people my age and they don't believe.

    - When I went to the cops to report a kidnap case and they were laughing and making light of the situation. I was speechless for over a minute.

    - When I heard "Nigerians confuse Corruption with mere Stealing. Stealing is not Corruption".

    - When I heard how much Neymar Jr. will be earning in a month at PSG. #blackout.

    - When I heard Ahiara Diocese rejected Pope Benedict's bishop appointee and virtually challenged this directive for 5 years.

    - First time a lady toasted me. Lol

    1. So you have joined the people questioning Neymar's earnings abi? ๐Ÿ™„๐Ÿ™„TNHW

  7. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

    When i watch my photos and conversations on facebook from way back 2010.

  8. Lol
    Uncle basketmouth has announced that he's running for governorship of five states, he should just run for president na.

    I like that speed's song tho, it literally lifts the soul out of depression.

  9. Did you come? I didn't know when it started๐Ÿ˜ฎ *of blessed memory* ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… Thelma biko i hope the owner of that sub doesnt read this blog. #VeryHarsh

  10. Did you come? I didn't know when it started๐Ÿ˜ฎ *of blessed memory* ๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜…๐Ÿ˜… Thelma biko i hope the owner of that sub doesnt read this blog. #VeryHarsh

  11. When my 3yr old son woke me up with "mum, take your ring, why did you remove it eh, take your ring and don't remove it again." I was disoriented. When i wasn't responding he followed with, "do you hear me? Take your ring and don't remove it again." Hian! Meanwhile ring wasn't even mine, his dad removed his so he could carry his dumbbells then forgot to put it back on. Sighs... Kids.

  12. Hi Thelma
    Pls where can I find reports of Nigerian law cases online.
    Many thanks.

    1. Hello, check Law Pavillion. You can Google it. You may need to pay but I think there's a (free) trial period before you have to pay. I think the trial period is 30 days but I'm not quite sure. You'd find all you need there.

  13. Nร–5 oo ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚ bobo likes sontin and just said it. no biggie๐Ÿ˜‚

    and then compliments you on your cuteness, there is nothing out of the ordinary here๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  14. That No. 5 though. Even I would be speechless. ๐Ÿ˜‚ ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  15. When my 2 year old comes to tye sitting room witg my megally padded bra and say mummy take your "nene" /"breast".

    Don't remove your "nene" again.

  16. Thelma, this post is epic.

    When a young boy visited us years back and was given tissue paper to wipe his butt, and he asked "ki ni ma fi se" / "what should I do with it"?

  17. ๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚๐Ÿ˜‚

  18. @5, awww your cousin is so cute
    Number 7 left me in stitches, lmao


  19. Thanks Thelma for your response on how to get law reports.

  20. When neighbours call me 'mama Ovie' I am like huh? I look like mama to you . Hiss
    When someone says something stupid like : you don't like going out with Your kids because you want people to think you are single . Say what ?
    When someone told me, you can never lose weight , it's your nature to be fat. Err... Bros come let me give you a knock on your head.
    When my three year old son tells me the story of the cow and goat , and how the cow pushed the goat because the goat farted and the fart had an awful smell.
    And when he says mummy , did you fart? Go to the toilet now! Ewo! Chimo
    And those moments when I reach cloud nine . All I experience is peace. End of discussion

  21. Nice post T... you deserve the very best


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