I've been pretty much holed up all weekend, because conjunctivitis. However I had to attend a meeting in the afternoon yesterday. It would be the first meeting this year for the Board Of Trustees of an organization I'm with so it was pretty mandatory.
My eyes and half of my face look like uncooked meat (honestly I wish I could show you but you may lose your appetite) so I grabbed a pair of shades and headed for Westwood Hotel, Ikoyi. During the meeting we kept hearing bursts of music from the floor above, it sounded like they were having a sound check. Halfway through I got up to go to the ladies and when I stepped out this fine bearded dark skinned gentleman was standing at the door waiting for me. He introduced himself and said he'd seen me when he walked in. He immediately told me what he does for a living. I took in his well groomed appearance, Gucci shoes, suede blazers, polished diction and profession and immediately handed him my business card; target client alert!!!
I decided to have my lunch after the meeting so after the other members of the board left, I went in and sat in a corner where I could eat in solitude. The fine gentleman approached me. (*insert: because I was alone I took my shades off. When he got to my table and I looked up at him, he jumped back. Literally jumped back. I tell you my face looks like raw meat!*). I quickly put my shades on and apologized; I have an eye infection. He soon recovered from the shock and asked if I would like to join him upstairs.
Apparently the music we had been hearing during the meeting was from the floor above us. Musician Bantu was having his album Launch and he was an invited guest. I wasn't in much of a hurry so I said I would join him and a few minutes later I did.
The pictures above, on the left is me heading out for my meeting. On the right is me at Bantu's Launch.
So we had a few cocktails and some laughs but I wasn't feeling strong enough to handle all that excitement. My eyes and head had been throbbing evening, and the loud music and flashing lights made me feel like I might have an epileptic attack so I soon left.
The minute I got into bed my phone rang. It was him. Our conversation went something like this.
"So why aren't you married?"
i guess this should be #8 on my 7 speechless moments list. I was speechless.
"Why aren't you married?" He asked again.
"I don't even know how to answer that question"
"Beautiful girl like you"
"Is it by beauty?"
"Somehow yes. But it's not just your beauty. I like your humility, and your carriage. I don't understand how you can be single. You have everything a man will want. A beautiful girl like you should not be single"
I could feel my head throbbing harder.
"Are you married?" I asked him.
"Yes. But my wife is in Abuja at the moment on an assignment. We have a daughter. She will be 1 in December".
"Anyway, I like you. I really really like you. Nothing attached to it. Just genuine likeness. Can we see tomorrow evening?"
I said we couldn't and explained why.
"I have a husband for you. I'm going to give you a husband because I really like you. I'll give you a very good man because that is what you deserve. But I want to date you first because I really like you. Then I will introduce you a very nice guy to marry. Let's see on Tuesday so that we can discuss better ".
And that was the most confusing piece of fuckery I'd heard all weekend.
So my people, there you have it. For centuries women have given men their bodies in exchange for money and the things money can buy. Have we gotten to a new era, one where women will give men their bodies, not in exchange for money but for a ring, from another man?