"Shhhh, don't wake Aunty Nwando up, she's still sleeping", were the words that actually woke me up.
It was my elder sister pleading with my two boisterous nephews who have no regard for other people's sleep and wanted to jump into my bed and smother me with love before heading to school.
Well I pretended to still be asleep until they left. They're the brightest spots in my life but I was already feeling upset barely seconds after waking, because just like I realized when my crush asked me last night "what are your plans for tomorrow", I had no plans!
I hate days like this. You know, the one when you wake up on a weekday, the first day of the week no less, already knowing that you have absolutely nothing to do on that day.
I know I could read, try to write, do some research... But in actual truth I really just wish I had something tangible, purposeful to do.
Speaking of the crush, I blocked him on WhatsApp after that conversation last night. Blocked him on Whatsapp, blocked his line from being able to call mine, blocked his texts from entering my phone.
His offense? He doesn't like me the way I like him.
Remember I asked if I should shoot my shot? Well I did. We're cool, on the few occasions that he calls we talk for an hour or two, we really get along and I feel a connection.
Unfortunately na only me waka come.
When I woke up this morning I re-saved his number and unblocked him all over again.
Apparently it's not an offense not to like somebody back na. I didn't want the awkward conversation we'll have if he eventually reaches me, maybe through another line, and then I would have to find reasons why I went on a blocking spree. "Because you don't like me back!!!" would sound like an infantile rant, or worse yet portray me as a weirdo.
The truth; "Because I'm not used to this, I'm tired of hoping its you every time my phone makes a sound. I'm tired of the sinking feeling in my chest when it's not you. I'm tired of waiting and waiting and w a i t i n g for your response when I send you a message and I'm tired of receiving a one-liner after waiting for hours for you to respond" may seem too honest and freak him out.
In any case, crush is the least of my problems on this Monday morning.
The last couple of weeks have been really busy at my end, and now, nothing! What do you do when you have nothing to do? 😟
And btw who is digging my new hair style? I showed up to sasha bones house with it and she couldn't stop laughing, but that one is her business. I am tired biko.