Now my neighbour likes where I stay, but doesn't know the price that I pay...
My neighbour wants what he sees...
Now my neighbour likes my clothes, but hasn't seen me with my scars exposed...
It's funny how this CeeLo Green song has been playing in my head all day and then I went out and is the perfect case of art imitating life.
A few hours ago my sister came into my room to tell me she'd be going to Ebeano, I offered to go as I was having an extremely boring Sunday and I'd grown restless.
She asks me to please take her kids, at first I refuse because I want peace and quiet but she cajoles me and I agree on the condition that Grace (our house help) would come along to help with the kids.
A few minutes later she hands me this long-ass shopping list and I'm actually very happy about it because I really have nothing to do at the moment, so I pack the three boys into the car and Grace too, and off we go.
Seeing as there's a lot to buy, I grab the big trolley, put the youngest kid in it and everyone else trails behind us. Halfway through I see my former classmate from QC, baby girl hasn't changed one bit, I'm actually staring at her in awe. I notice she's not alone, her hubby is behind her and he's carrying the most adorable baby girl ever! I'm standing there thinking they made such a cute picture, she's as tall I am but rather slim, her husband is even taller. Young, fine guy with nice beards, and the way he's the one carrying their baby is sooooooo cute. They are everything!
She and I do not exchange pleasantries, I try to catch her eyes a few times but she always looks away. It's just as well because I know she's thinking the boys are my kids and I think its best for us to leave it laidat. LOL.
I never could have guessed the thoughts running through her head.
Soon after, one of my carts gets full and I have to get another one, and when we're done we proceed to the counter to pay. Coincidentally she and her husband join my line. I'm thinking its weird seeing as I have a lot to pay for and the other counters were pretty free.
Anyways I pay and I leave with my battalion.
An hour later, I get a call from one of my QC friends and immediately I answer the phone and she's laughing like a looney
"Come o! When did you marry and born 3 children?"
I ask her what she's on about and she tells me.
Apparently the chic I saw in Ebeano is a friend of hers and she had called my friend to tell her that she had just seen me and she couldn't believe her eyes. She told her how I shopped with two trolleys both filled go the brim, how my eldest "son" has long locks reaching his back, how he must be in one of these expensive schools on the Island because most schools don't allow boys to lock their hair, how even my house girl is tall and fresh and speaks Queen's English (truly sha, Grace looks nothing like a domestic staff and the girl cannot speak pidgin, even when I was picking the detergent I asked her "Shebi its cah-nu (canoe) soap I should buy?" She said "Yes, kayy-no deterrrgent", I no blame am sha 😂). She talked about how I wasn't even looking at the prices before randomly picking stuff off the shelves and freezers and tossing them into my carts, she said my tab was almost 50k and I didn't even flinch, I just handed them my ATM card. And finally she said that when I was leaving she saw that I was driving a brand new mega-sega jeep which she knows costs over N22M".
I ask my friend what she told her.
"I said God has blessed you noni". We both burst out laughing.
In reality it's not funny. This girl will now go home and be squeezing face for that her fine husband, she will be venting in her mind and be saying "is it not men like you that are giving their wives 500,000 for house allowance? Is it not my mates that are driving big big jeep?". Envy and discontent would be eating her up because she just saw her former classmate and her life is no where as good as mine.
Meanwhile, husband, I no get. Pikin, I never get. Car, I no even get at the moment. 😂😂😂
And that's exactly how many of us sit down and get all salty scrolling through instagram, peering at the seemingly perfect lives of others and some of them don't even have half of what we do.
Ps, I wrote this yesterday but forgot to post.
So on this morning lets do ourselves a favour, water your own grass and count your own blessings. 😊
Btw December is in a couple of days, how does that make you feel?