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To Be OR Not To Be a Cougar?


So for over a week I've been getting mails and messages asking why I've been MIA. The most recent was from Chrisyinks saying "posting has been a bit infrequent and less personal/original". I love reading whatever Chris writes, including this feedback. 

He didn't tell me anything I'm not aware of though, it's just, you know, life...

Too many things happening at the same time that it gets extremely difficult to focus on some things. I open my blog app everyday and I want to write but 2 minutes in, something else comes up and I'm off again. 

I guess that 11th month of the year comes with its own special kind of fever, and some sort of pressure. 

So with regards to sharing personal stuff, I think it's been pretty tame at my end. Business wise, God showed himself for me and I cannot thank Him enough. On the romance front... I'm not even sure what to say. I've talked about baby boy here, right? That one, I'm just watching him with side eyes. He disappeared for a minute then came back and things went back to it's fun and flirty self, but I'm still looking at him with those side eyes. There's a newer prospect on the block. Now this is the realest prospect yet he's the one I shy away from, because I might be a bit to scared of "real". You see, that's why I f*ck with baby boy. I always knew from the get-go that there'd be no happy-ever-afters, just mindless fun moments of flirtation and flights of fancy, and I really like(d) that. I didn't want the burden of having to spend moments thinking or planning my future with someone. 

Last night I told Kon that I'm scared and worried because marriage isn't hungrying me, and I need it to.  I long to feel that desire to want to settle down. Kon said "*yimu*, you just haven't met the right person yet". I sincerely hope he's right. You know, I dont want to wake up one day with regrets...

Now besides this strong prospect above, I seem to have suddenly started attracting younger men. Ok, this didn't just start but in the past week it's been something else. I've been approached by 4 younger guys at the very least. One in particular shocked me. This guy stalked me around Ebeano and then back to my car. He was with a friend so I'd hoped I was mistaken and they weren't really following me around. I mean, on that day I had no make up on, was wearing a boubou, had on my granny glasses and bathroom slippers. It wasn't until I turned on my ignition and heard a knock on my window that I realized he really had been following me around. I wound down to hear him out, perhaps he wanted to beg for money or something, which was very unlikely considering that he looked like an overly pampered kid. He was actually very cute, 17 year old me would have fallen into instant infatuation but the 30+ me stared in amusement. I asked him what he wanted and he said he'd like to be my friend. The next few minutes had us saying "how old are you" and "age is nothing but a number" over and over. When I grew bored I told him I had to leave and he timidly handed me his iPhone 8 to type in my number. I was tempted to ask him to dash me his iPhone and he probably would have, daddy would simply buy him another one...

I refused to give him my number and told him I'd see him around. He really was cute though, nice yellow complexion with the sides of this head shaved low and the middle in short dreads, he also had a nice athletic build. Unfortunately that guy didn't look a day over 19. He eventually told me he's 28 and that was when I laughed and laughed and laughed and told him I needed to leave. My laughter seemed to hurt him. 

But you see, there's this other one, let's call him Oj. I met him when I was leaving the Blessed Sacrament some days ago. He had driven his dad to church. I recognized his dad as one of those revered and respected personalities in church, obviously a very successful man in his 50s/60s. So this guy comes to me and starts chatting me up. He was wearing thick grey socks and Nike slides, basketball shorts and a Tshirt that hung loosely from his wide shoulders and lanky torso, and he had a serious face, albeit an appealing one. 

He asked if he could walk me home and I told him I didn't live in the estate and would call an Uber. Then he politely asked me to please give him a few minutes to go ask his dad if he could quickly drop me at home, without waiting for my response he bounded off to the chapel and returned a minute later with a grin, gesturing for me to follow him to his dad's car. It was a G-wagon and he immediately explained to me that it's his father's car (duuuuh!) and his is a lot more modest, and way cheaper. 
      And that's one thing I really like about Oj, his humility. Oj went to Corona for Primary school, Atlantic Hall for secondary. From there on out it was schooling oversees until he returned to serve Nigeria (he lasted only 2 days in camp! 😭😭) and now works with a new generation bank, in IT. And he just turned 25. But despite his obvious well-off background he's very well-behaved and a tad naive. 

We talk a lot, everyday since we first met. I tease him to introduce me to his dad and then he gets irritable and then I say, "just for business" and then he says "just tell me what you need, I can handle it". He's so cute πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚.

Anyways, nah, nothing romantic there o! I may hook him up with up with one of my nice younger friends eventually, although he keeps saying he doesn't want a girlfriend and even if he does, he wants someone who's "mature". YIMU!πŸ˜πŸ˜…

Anyways, that's that at my end. Oh please tell me what's been happening with you. How is November coming along? Are you ready for 2018 to come, or do you need more time, like me? 

Ps; we need to revisit this topic of younger guys and their sudden interest in older chics. I reckon that there's no supply without demand 😊. Someone needs to ask these Lekki women what they're getting up to these days πŸ™ˆπŸ˜‚.


  1. Good to have you back, You look good.

    Another girl

    1. Oh hello Another girl 😍😍, glad to be back. I just hope I can keep up.

    2. Welcome back Tee..maybe you should give OJ my details. ..I dunno whats with younger guys and older ladies maybe the guys can answer that or maybe you look younger than you are

    3. @ Thelma

      Many thanks for the compliment. Yeah, you do look beautiful.

      Nothing much on my end.....just end of semester concerns and looking forward to Christmas with family. In the meanwhile, I can look forward to thanksgiving filled with so much food. Chrisyinks

  2. How's November coming along? I've left 2017 behind o ! So much so that I read an article about last year's economy and was rechecking my head because it referred to last year as 2016. Lol. Me, I'm already in 2018 abeg.

    1. Why is my name a comment and my comment tagged as by anonymous?

  3. It feels good to have you back. I've been refreshing this page endlessly since you left. Well, November has been coming along quite nicely for my blog. I also had a redirection for my life and since discovering that, I would say I'm living my best life right now.

  4. I am scared a bit of 2018. I just left medical school and I am at that time and place where you wonder why your life is at a standstill and every other person is moving ahead.

    And November? It came with all kinds of issues. I cannot believe I let myself get so fat that breathing is currently an issue. I cannot even have a bath without panting like it was a race. Then the issues with my family. Can we get to December already?

    My complaints aside though, this year has been good. I can complain of being fat because I am done with school while some of my mates had to stay back in school to resit the exams or repeat.

  5. There're many reasons why some men prefer a lady that's older. I'm 27 and my bae is 31 and I want to marry her. Honestly the maturity is on another level, I think the sex is better as they know what they want and don't play games and the conversation is just so much better. I have dated girls that are younger than me and many of them don't know what they want and are still largely influenced by friends and social media. Their priorities are sometimes funny. To each his own. Thelma I think you should give a younger guy a chance, not the one who you think is 19, Oj sounds mature just give him a chance and see, you're just 32. Many people miss out on love because of this age thing.

    1. Boss man!

      I have never been with an older chic. Too late to mark that activity off my list.

      @Thelma: You would be a super hot cougar. Maybe...just should try it out.
      I always say: You find the best things in the most unexpected places.


  6. My friend only dates older women, because they don't bother him about marriage, it's purely for fun.
    I'm 27 years old and my 23 year old Girlfriend makes me understand what maturity in older women means

  7. Everyday I beg God for the kind of confidence these guys haveπŸ™
    Meanwhile November has been slow and routine and I'm still expectant of an important text.

  8. November for me is perfect, finally done with my Psychiatry Nursing program.
    Hope for a good job God's willing

  9. November has been surprisingly fast for me. Waiting eagerly for December so me and my sister can catch up and have some mad fun (praying for the money to do so). I wouldn't know about being a cougar considering I'm still a baby myself but you can just explore that front and see how it goes. Yes I missed you and your posts Thelma. Meanwhile I need encouragement @kabuoy and co, this celibacy thing is hard πŸ˜₯😭

    1. Lol @ celibacy is hard, you can do it, try and focus on other things,read a book,do something else because if you are idle your thoughts will be crowded with irrelevant things. You will be fine baby girl.

  10. Thelma!!! You are beautiful so dont blame them, lol. Enjoy the moment girl cos few years from now when junior is cranking up,you wont have an iota of regret. So live each day as it comes,have as much fun as you want. While you are at it,wake that marriage spirit up cos it will definitely happen.


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